I'm selfish?

but I just wanted to send a friendly reminder – you don’t owe anybody anything.

Shower thoughts are the deepest – am I right? One evening (April 11, 2019 to be exact), I was washing up and realized a few things. But one thing I want to focus on is the concept of being selfish.

As a child, your parents, teachers and annoying kids who were upset that you wouldn’t pass the LEGO would often say, “share” or  “don’t be stingy.” I’m here to tell you that in your adult life, you need to be selfish. Hopefully this concept doesn’t go over your head.

Selfishness tends to have a negative connotation (it’s all about you while disregarding others) but selfishness can be healthy.

In my personal life, I always tend to put others before me. My mom says that I’m accommodating and very considerate, which are both accurate statements. I always try to make sure that other people are good. But after being burned a few good times, I started to realize that I can look out for others and still make sure I’m straight...first. Some of ya’ll may be thinking “duh” but my heart is sometimes bigger than my head, and I have a big head.

Specifically, I’ve become more stingy with my time and who I let come into my personal space. I’ve had to sacrifice going out or turning up, which often keeps me in the house most weekends. Or I’ve stepped back from friendships or romantic relationships that weren’t beneficial or conducive to my growth. But in doing so I’ve learned so much about whom I want to spend my time with and where.

I know this post was brief but I just wanted to send a friendly reminder – you don’t owe anybody anything. Say no and feel good about it. It’s not wrong to want to do what’s best for you. It’s not wrong to want to live happy and healthy. It’s not wrong to want to feel loved or valued.

Self-care is all about committing to your needs as you would someone else’s. You deserve it! And when you are "selfish" enough to set yourself up to feel your best, you will be able to give your best to the world around you.